The Laundry Detergent That Never Made It to the Cart

This morning started like most mornings do.

Laundry humming in the background. Shoes being hunted down. Backpacks zipped. Hair brushed just enough to count. Somewhere between switching the clothes over and reminding everyone what time school starts, I noticed we were out of laundry detergent.

I need to add laundry detergent to the grocery order.

Easy enough. I keep a running cart on my phone. I add things as we run out. It takes two seconds.

But two seconds didn’t exist this morning.

By my lunch break from work, while I was loading the dishwasher instead of eating lunch, the thought popped back into my head. Laundry detergent. Still not on the list. Still something I meant to do. Still something that should be simple.

Then the afternoon came. School pickup. Conversations in the car. Snacks. Homework questions. Starting dinner. And there it was again.

Oh man. I never added laundry detergent.

Three reminders in one day. Zero follow-through.

And here’s the thing—this isn’t about laundry detergent.

The Mental Load No One Sees

Mothers don’t just do things.

We track things.

We remember what’s running low.

We anticipate what’s needed next week.

We hold schedules, emotions, deadlines, meals, and milestones all at once.

Our brains are open tabs. Constantly refreshing.

So when something “small” slips through the cracks, it’s easy to feel frustrated. To wonder why we can manage everyone else’s needs but forget something as basic as laundry detergent.

But the truth is—forgetting doesn’t mean failing.

It means you were already carrying a full load.

Grace Looks Like Perspective

There was no emergency. No one suffered. The laundry didn’t pile up into a crisis because I forgot detergent.

Life moved on.

And yet, so many of us would still mentally dock ourselves points for it.

What if instead, we paused and said:

• Look at everything I handled today.

• Look at how many roles I played.

• Look at how much I held together.

Because that list?

The one in your head?

It’s long.

And you don’t get extra credit for never dropping a ball—but you deserve recognition for juggling them in the first place.

Finding 40 Is About This Too

Finding 40 isn’t about perfection.

It’s about awareness.

It’s about noticing the weight we carry—and choosing compassion over criticism.

So if you forgot the laundry detergent today…

Or the permission slip…

Or the email you meant to send…

You’re not behind.

You’re human.

And you’re doing more than you think.

The laundry detergent can wait.

You’re already enough.